New Years Resolution FAIL

I wish I could say that the reason I failed to blog yesterday was because I filled my writing quota by working on the novel but alas I cannot. I'm sad to admit that after only three days I totally spaced out the resolution and didn't write a thing. The funny thing is I was doing my usual morning internet cruising of Ravelry and Facebook and thought to myself, "this is really the time I should be writing instead of the end of the day when I'm tired and should be in bed." So then I find myself tucked in after watching some Six Feet Under (great show btw) and it's 12:30am when I realize that I had a writing FAIL for the day.

However! I shall not let this get me down. There are still 361 more days for me to get it right and it would be foolish to give up after a minor stumble. Onward and Upward!

What I see now is that I really should be writing in the morning. My evenings are too packed with stuff to try and cram writing in on top of it all. It's my tendancy to put things off till the last minute but in this situation it's really counterintuitive. I have more time in the morning when Quinn is at school and the girls like to watch their morning PBS shows while I sip my chai. So that is another habit I will work on integrating. Plus I need to go to bed earlier. 6 or 7 hours of sleep just isn't enough for me and so getting to bed at 10 is really important. It is 10:21 right now so I'd better wrap this most boring and mundane blog entry up.

I think I'm going to change the settings so my blog update doesn't post to facebook everytime I publish. I'm worried that I'm spamming people's newfeeds with the daily notes and I feel kinda self conscious about it. So.... yeah.. the link to my blog is on my page if anyone is interested in reading these ramblings.

G'night.

the witch under the stairs

When Azalea woke up this morning she began describing in great detail her dream with fervor. She asked me in a rapid and urgent tone, "What lives under our stairs, mom? Is there a bad witch under the stairs??" I told here that nothing could live under our stairs because there was nothing but dirt under there. (After The Flood many a year ago our basement was filled with silt and there are still closed off portions that have yet to be dug clear.) She proceeded to tell me that in her dream a bad witch had taken her friend Beth and that she lived under the stairs. She went on and on with details that were hard to decipher because she was talking so fast and sometimes her speech is still hard to understand, especially in the morning when my brain is still foggy. She wanted to go across the street to make sure that Beth was okay and I had to reassure her that dreams were not real, that Beth was probably still sound asleep and that we should go back to sleep too because it was 6am and it was much too early to be awake on a Sunday. Thankfully she took my advice and we snuggled until sleep returned for us both. When we woke up to face the day at 9 she continued to talk about the same dream as if there had been no break in the conversation from three hours earlier. It was the strangest thing. She's talked about her dreams for awhile now but this was so much more detailed and serious than she had ever been before. It's so interesting to watch her try and decipher reality from fantasy. I marvel at how powerful the imagination is for her. She has a dream of a bad witch under the stairs and it's as real to her as I am. She goes outside to call out to the Care Bears that she is so certain live in the clouds and gets really upset when they don't answer her. She begs to go visit Edward Scissorhands or Dorothy and Toto because she is so convinced that they are really out there somewhere. Four year olds are amazing.

just keep typing...just keep typing..

Here it is only the second day and I'm already feeling at a loss for anything interesting to write on my blog. My life seems pretty consistently mundane from day to day so I'm always hesitant to write about it on here because my inner critic just chides me for thinking that anyone would have an interest in reading about it. I must work harder to squash that annoying little voice down and write onward if I'm going to stick with this resolution.

My mom came over today and offered to watch the kids while I took her car somewhere. Since I didn't want to spend money I opted to go to the library for some quiet time. I ended up getting on the internet and reading part of my novel for an hour. It's been almost a month since I've looked at it and seeing it with fresh eyes has renewed my momentum to see it finished. I read the end and was pleased to see that even though I rushed through that part to finish by the deadline it is still a pretty decent bit of writing. A bit heavy in the sappy romance department but hey, some people like that sort of thing, myself included and I refuse to be too hard on myself for writing something fluffy. It may be cheesy but it's fun and people like fun, especially me and the most important thing I'm learning is that I need to write something that *I* enjoy, otherwise the process is tedious and well... not fun.

One hang up that I'm facing right now is juggling all these projects that I want to work on. The novel thing is on something of a deadline since the free proof copy that I won from NaNoWriMo expires in May. I'd like my novel to be finished and edited by then so I can have the pleasure of getting a copy that can sit on my bookshelf amongst the rest in all it's glory. Another thing that is nagging at me is my spinning wheel. It's officially been a year now that I've owned her and she is still unfinished. It's just the last little bit of detail work that is left before I can oil the wood properly to protect it from changes in humidity and dirt. I can already see that the wood has changed color from being handled by me and the occasional grubby child's hand. I had vowed to finish it before a year had passed and I'm disappointed that I didn't stick with that. Then there's this weaving bug that's bitten me. Oh, I can be so scattered and I really wish I was better at finishing things in a timely manner. Procrastination has long been my nemesis.

School starts up for Quinn on Tuesday. I'm simultaneously happy and mournful for it to begin. I've enjoyed being able to stay home and not have to rush around in the morning. I need to make a better effort to get to bed earlier and wake up earlier so we can take our time before leaving for school and it's going to be even harder since we've slid back into a late schedule during the break. On the other hand I will be happy for Quinn to have something to occupy his brain during the day besides video games and harrassing his sisters- his two favorite pastimes. Santa brought us a Wii for Christmas and I've been lax on the time restrictions I usually impose on the video games during the break. I think it will do Quinn a lot of good to unplug for the school week when I only allow him one 30 minute session that he has to earn by doing a chore. The weekends are basically the only time he is allowed to play for long stretches and there is a noticable difference in his attitude when he has been playing too much.

Well... my hands hurt now because I've been weaving a bunch today so I'm going to wrap this up. Maybe I'll do a recap of the holidays tomorrow. I like to read back though the blog about what we were up to years ago so I don't want to forget to document the important stuff that I'll want to remember later.

G'night!

Hello blog. Long time no see. It's a new year and I'm making a resolution to write on a daily basis. I'm not committing to it being a blog entry a day because I've still got a novel to finish and I'm sure there will be days when contributing to that is as much as I can manage. However I do want to make a point of documenting my life on a more regular basis and I'm sure there will be days when I have absolutely no desire to write a single thing on my novel and the blog can act as a substitute for my daily writing quota.

Today I spent most of the day researching looms as I try and make a decision about whether or not I should buy the 16" Kromski Harp or go for the 24" or totally jump ship and get the Ashford rigid heddle. It's a tough decision but I think I'm nearing a finality on the matter. I've been weaving a scarf on the 16" harp that I've rented from the LYS and I'm very pleased with how the loom feels. I'll probably end up purchasing it. My only regret is that to make a nice wide shawl or blanket I'll have to sew panels together. It's not ideal but I think it's a fair trade off considering that 90% of the time I'll be weaving scarves that fit just fine on the smaller loom. The 16" is comfortable in my lap and I don't need a stand for it. I'm not sure I'd be able to say the same about the 24". The main reason I considered going with the Ashford instead was because someone pointed out that the quality of the wood might be superior (New Zealand Silver Beech) to that of the Kromski (European Alder). The concern being that screws more easily strip the softer wood I guess. I haven't come across any posts of people with this problem though so I think I'm going to go ahead and not worry about it. I prefer the look of the Kromskis and the fact that they fold where the Ashford does not. My house is tiny and that folding is helpful.

Here's a look at my first work in progress-



So let's see.. We undecorated the tree in preparation for returning it to storage but I couldn't bring myself to take it down completely. It adds a nice amount of light to the living room and I need to replace a bulb in a lamp to compensate for the darkness that the tree had been keeping at bay. We get so little reprieve fromthe dark this time of year.

Well it's late and I just wanted to get something written before heading to bed. I was getting ready to brush my teeth when I realized I was about to fail on my resolution on the first day so here I am preventing that sad fate.

Oh and one last note of something important that happened today besides entering a new decade. There is now a new Doctor. I got to watch the final adventure of Ten and the ushering in of Eleven. It was exciting and sad at the same time. Ten will always be My Doctor and it was hard seeing his run end but this is also the first regeneration I've been witness to as a fan of the show and there was a great deal of anticipation and wonderment at what the future will bring. I think Eleven will be great in his own unique way and I'm eagerly awaiting the spring now. And not just because it means the sun will be returning to this frozen land.

Allons y!

First Goal!

Big day for our soccer player... Q scored his first goal ever today and to make it even more awesome it was the only score by anyone from either team the whole game so he won it for the Green Geckos! Q's score was made by a penalty shot that the coach made a point of letting him take. I later found out it was because last night at practice Q said to the coach, "Coach, I wanna make a goal in the next game." When the coach was telling me this story at the end of the game today he had a really big smile on his face.. I think he was beaming more than Q!

I guess we're gonna go eat out tonight to celebrate. Yay! There's a halibut sandwich with my name on it. mmmm..... halibut.... *drool*

(soccer pictures forthcoming)

the joys of potty learning

I've started trying to get Meme on the potty lately. It's looking like it may be a bit premature. Today I heard rumbling coming from her diaper region so I jumped up, whipped off her diaper and plopped her on the seat. There we sat for a good 15 minutes playing with a toy and waiting for something... anything... to happen. To no avail. So I picked her up and as soon as I set her feet upon the floor... She peed. On the floor... and my foot. *sigh*

25 Random Things

1. I enjoy brown miso as a sandwich condiment.

2. I was teargassed by riot cops and nearly swept out to sea all in one day in Miami. The picture is from that day. >>>

3. I've birthed 3 babies underwater and the idea of landbirth scares me.

4. My knowledge of astrology far exceeds the average person's and I once considered becoming a professional astrologer.

5. I am a serial hobbyist. I have a tendency to adopt more art and craft interests than I could ever possibly have time for.

6. I am addicted to internet surfing. No one website in particular.. I just flow amongst many. I seem to get sucked into some kind of vortex where time ceases to exist until someone calls me back to real life by demanding my attention. Despite this, I stink at replying to emails in any kind of timely fashion.

7. I hate washing dishes.

8. I can recognize and identify a wide variety of ball python color morphs.

9. My maternal grandmother's uncle- Walter Harper, was the first man to reach the summit of Denali.

10. Ten years ago I was hospitalized for three weeks after a psychotic break from reality. You might say I'm a psycho in remission. Consequently I have a very keen understanding of the fragility of sanity.

11. I still still harbor my childhood dream of becoming a comic book artist.

12. I often wish my Grandma Sandberg could see how well I knit today. She tried teaching me when I was about 12 and I failed miserably. It's my favorite hobby now.

13. My first child was born on Friday the 13th.

14. After developing a strange allergic reaction to the oils in coffee I had to switch to tea and now have chai every morning.

15. I home school my kids.

16. My favorite game is pool and I don't get to play nearly often enough now that I have kids.

17. I fantasize about living in an intentional community that focuses on sustainable living and permaculture.

18. I just started drinking a daily tonic of apple cider vinegar, raw honey and baking soda. It's fizzy and surprisingly delicious!

19. I am using cooking shows as a tool to force myself to enjoy cooking. It seems to be working... slowly ... but surely.

20. When I finally build my own home it will be made of straw bale.

21. I've lived in Fairbanks, Alaska.... Madison, Wisconsin.... Portland, Oregon.... and Nederland, Colorado. I still can't decide where it is that I want to settle in for the long haul.

22. I'm not very good at writing lists or managing my time but I recognize that these are skills I absolutely need to cultivate in order to get what I want out of life. I'm a work in progress yet.

23. After experiencing death intimately I no longer fear it for where it may take me. My only fear is leaving behind loved ones who may still need me.

24. I am a worrier.

25. I am a optimist.